You can be right, or you can be happy

When I was younger, I was more argumentative than now.

Being right was the most important thing to me. I had to win arguments, in fact it wasn’t enough to win- I wanted to crush people.  

Clearly I had some issues.

I got myself into a lot of trouble.

My Dad was a really big influence in my early years in getting me to think differently. He’s a very wise man.

One day as I was arguing with him about something he clearly didn’t give one solitary shit about, he sighed, and he said to me “Rebecca, you can be right or you can be happy.”

I’m sure he must have read that somewhere. A lot of his wisdom comes from the fact that he has a lot of time of day for learning and reading and growing his brain.

At first, I wanted to argue with that as well.

How wrong is that?

Surely I can be right and happy at the same time because being right and being on the same page as someone will make me happy? We will have the same understanding, I won’t be alone in my own opinion, and I’ll be right!

Then I sat with it some more.

If they didn’t hear me the first couple of times I put my points across, they likely weren’t considering changing their minds.

I’ll be pushing them away by insisting that I’m right, which ends up isolating me.

Why would being right make me happy if it took me so much stress to get there? In fact, why does it mean so much to me that I should be right? Why do I need to seem better than them, someone who can pass on my knowledge? Why do I need the approval and validation of being right?

Why am I fighting?

So yeah, Dad was right.

I can be right, or I can be happy.

We have such a mindset ingrained in us that there’s an in group and out group. Those who agree and those who disagree, what’s right and what’s wrong. A lot of the time we unnecessarily take it a step further, and we say, ‘I can get on with these people, but anyone who disagrees cannot be in my life’.

All we do is isolate ourselves.

Why are we fighting?

Why do we feel like we have to blow things up so much and create such a level of separation between ourselves and others when a lot of these conflicts of opinions don’t even matter?

I’m seeing a lot of people arguing lately and getting all wound up about things that don’t really matter. I got caught up in it all too. The world goes through phases like that.

The world would be nothing without duality and conflicts of opinions. This planet is based off of duality.

We are just hairless monkeys floating on a rock, and it’s not always got to be that deep.

Just thought I’d share.

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