Something I have always struggled with is the ability to keep myself from becoming irritated. I think before birth I signed up to be tested to keep my temper, which is funny to think about.
As we come to the end of the second month of lockdown- I’m sure you can imagine that this irritability is through the roof. I’m sure a lot of readers could relate too.
Being an empath I find it really hard to maintain a sense of peace and happiness knowing that there is so much injustice in the world.
By the same hand I often throw myself into activism to escape my own emotions and my own feelings of irritability directed at my life.
Again- I’m sure a lot of people can relate.
So I wanted to talk about what I’ve been focusing on and how I’ve been trying to reshape this way of thinking.
First of all- I’ve been trying to stay away from twitter and Facebook and the areas of the internet where people are chatty and opinionated.
I almost feel a sense of guilt not educating myself on all the unjust areas of life that need to be shone a light on- because I know I have a voice and a certain level of privilege.
But something I’ve also been reminding myself is that your voice is only powerful when magnetic. And you are only magnetic when you uplift people.
You need to empower people before they can solve problems.
You can’t pour from an empty cup.
If you don’t feel good, important, powerful, worthy- how are you going to make others feel like that?
So in knowing that- I know that I need to be so happy that my happiness radiates and spreads to other people.
That’s a pleasurable thing to do anyway.
As much as the bad in the world makes me want to attack people and tell them they’re blind and ignorant (we’re only human after all) what good would that do??
Which brings me to my next point.
In lockdown- social media is not a nice place.
People are irritated, sad, grieving, frustrated, and feeling repressed.
When we feel something that we dislike in ourselves- particularly when we are bored, we overlook our character and our sense of self. We look outwards for entertainment and distraction without first connecting in with ourselves.
We don’t instinctually connect with ourselves when we feel bad because it is uncomfortable.
So our irritability, judgement of self, harshness of self, dislike of self gets projected onto the things we see.
All of a sudden we are finding the bad in everything.
Judging everyone we meet.
Struggling to mind our business.
It’s not because that’s who you are at your core- it’s because you resonate with all the bad you see in other people.
You may become OUTRAGED that somebody had unfollowed you, you may think they are self important, focussed on followers, superficial.
Yet you don’t know that person on a level to know if they really and truly are that way.
You don’t see their subtle day to day acts of kindness, hidden traits that only loved ones see, the way they become so generous when they are in intimate relationships.
You see the bad because you see those things in yourself. You, deep down- see yourself as focussed on followers. Perhaps a little superficial. Self important.
If you were to recognise these things within yourself and accept them- integrate them- understand these qualities and ultimately learn to love them; you wouldn’t have such a problem with that person unfollowing you.
Because honestly, it’s not that deep.
It’s all in the way you perceive it.
To be a good person is not to be incapable of darkness, but it’s someone who consciously chooses otherwise.
And you may worry that because those around you are not happy, your happiness is naivety. It’s undeserved.
But a happy person creates a ripple effect.
A friend once gave me this comparison and it has stuck with me.
So if I am a lighthouse, if I am happy and my energy is as powerful as it is- I cover a wide area. I make people happy by being happy around them, which lights up an area.
Then in the next town, there is another happy person acting as a lighthouse.
There are lighthouses dotted all over the world waking people up and lighting up their souls.
So although it seems dark at times, the world is on track. It always is.
Circling back to my original point: you can choose to see the good in everyday circumstances. By connecting with the self daily before projecting yourself onto the world- you can have a life full of love and peace.
Having a life full of gratitude, peace, creativity, abundance, wealth and excitement does not make you a bad person.
Those things are karmic gifts.
And being lucky in life does not mean you are automatically ignorant to the injustice in the world.
That will exist and you will be aware of it regardless.
Those types of things you can’t forget. Particularly if you have a connection with how it feels to be ignored.
So focus on building yourself up, becoming a magnet- and THEN you are in a position to use your voice and make a difference.
It won’t drag you down so much when you learn balance.
But nobody rose up by focussing on everything that’s down in the dumps.