When everything in your life seems to be going wrong but you refuse to change your behaviour, you are likely the problem.
If you walk about with a “woe is me” attitude and wear victim mentality like a badge, you are likely the problem.
When the same patterns repeat themselves to you over and over again, when a whole bunch of people you’ve met over the years have told you the same things you find yourself being told today, when you find things that inconvenience you in people that you insist THEY must change, you are likely the problem.
It takes a lot to be able to look ourselves in the mirror holding our head high and be able to say “yeah, you fucked up”. Often times we either wallow in self pity and make excuses as to why we fucked up without learning or adapting; or we will be too hard on ourselves and beat ourselves up on behalf of something that somebody else did. But when you are able to say, “I fucked up. I did this wrong, because this happened to me in the past and made me change, but that no longer serves me and it’s hurting others too- so here’s what I’m gonna do about it”, you have learned.
These bad things, cycles, patterns, shitstorms will stop repeatedly showing up in your life because you will no longer be running from them or feeding in to them. You will be owning them.
We all have good and bad inside of us, once you allow the good and bad to work in perfect harmony we will be a magnet for progress and success.
You will eventually tire of constantly being the problem because that is no way to live. That is when you’ll change. Once you own your mistakes, forgive yourself for them, learn from them in a way which modifies future behaviour, and then move on- you’ve just healed a massively destructive part of your life that was holding you back.
You can be soft, and you can be vulnerable and you can show emotion as well as protecting yourself and getting things done and being a boss. You can be fulfilled in every way you need. First, you need to be understood. By yourself, and then by those who wish to remain in your life. Shed your skin and let go of everything that keeps you where you are. There’s nothing holding you back now.
On a note which is directed to those of you who have done work and are still being criticised by those who don’t lift a finger; let go. If you are stuck in some kind of cycle of constantly being told you’re not good enough, you’re attracting that because YOU do not believe you are good enough. You’re being reflected your shadow side that needs love and respect. Acknowledge this, and it will all be clear to you. You’re better than that. Look at how far you’ve come, look at how hard you work. You’re sat here being frustrated at the fact that some person hasn’t matched you, but you grew because that’s something you had to do. You don’t match any more. You levelled up and if that hasn’t been matched then you’re like the winner of the game. Keep going, because there isn’t really any time nor use in looking over your shoulder and checking on somebody that doesn’t care. It’s not even sad when you realise how strong you are and how much you’ve levelled up.