how to glow up

artwork by

Margarita Kriebitzsch

Life has its ups and downs and sometimes we can lose ourselves in the downs.

Unfinished emotions stay with you and make you feel extra lost, so it’s important to feel them and release them.

You don’t just magically wake up one day having slept off your problems fresh as a daisy. Which is pretty inconvenient considering if you don’t understand what you need to do to feel good again, you could be carrying pain for years.

The mental health services aren’t quite their best at the moment. Therapy/ necessary help is pretty inaccessible, and people aren’t taught to heal themselves the way they should be.

We’re told to exercise, and eat well, and socialise, and live a ‘balanced lifestyle’. But what about when you do all that and you still feel sad?

The problems of the world (self care/ healing being taught in schools, etc) can be tackled in time but for now- lets take it upon ourselves to heal and make for a better future as a result.

If you’re looking to get past this feeling of emptiness and depression, it’s time to feel your feelings once and for all. It doesn’t matter how long it’s been since you felt the original sadness, or shock, or anger or betrayal. What matters is that you allow yourself to let it go.

Our job is not to make the world a better place by doing something ‘good enough’, or by being someone ‘important’. Our job is to be happy, because when we are happy, the world is a better place because of it. Being happy gives us an innate encouragement to be kind to others and do our bit. Our job is to go with the flow until the flow finds us exactly where we are needing to be.

So how do you get from a state of “aahhhh everything sucks I hate everyone I hate me I’ve been done so dirty BLEUGH” to “eh life’s pretty good and I’m happy”?

By taking care of yourself properly.

  1. Meditate.

To hear your emotion and to make sense of all the madness going on inside you right now- you need to get into a state of receptivity. You cannot find answers if you don’t let them come to you. You cannot find answers if you’re constantly looking for them. You need to let them come to you.

Meditation is the way to do that.
This is why you may find yourself lying in bed at night unable to quiet your mind. As you enter a relaxed state, the emotions, feelings, thoughts you have been repressing cease the opportunity to rise up and try to grab your attention.

Next time you’re in bed feeling that way, or better yet, next time you sit down with the intention to meditate; allow the emotion to unfold within you.

Why do I feel like that? Where has that come from? Why do I find myself in this position over and over again?

You may leave a meditation with more questions than you do answers- but at least you have scratched the surface now. You’ve started healing, and the rest will unfold with time when you come to revisit your meditation.

  • Reiki

I wasn’t so sure on the idea of reiki until I learned about the chakras. It’s one of them things that some people will believe in and some people won’t- but all I can say is, after trying it time and time again, I can stand by it.

I got my level 2 in reiki a few years back after receiving some free treatments from a friend who does it professionally.

Now, I listen to reiki infused music and YouTube videos as I meditate to help bring up thoughts and feelings which are somewhat inaccessible to me.

Reiki can be used with an intention behind it. You can receive reiki to heal the energetic body, you can use it to heal blocks to romantic relationships, or even to heal blocks to money and financial wellbeing.

The energy transfer brings up all the negative feelings, thought patterns, programmed beliefs you have behind these things which result in you living a certain way.

Reiki is best paired with meditation because it prompts you to understand where certain dormant emotions originated.

Whether your feeling comes from an experience you had as a child, a bad relationship with an ex, an unanswered question you have about why you were treated a certain way; once you identify where this emotion comes from/ what you’re upset about- you can begin to release it.

This may look ugly. Lots of tears, lots of anger, lots of release.

When it passes, you’ll be better for it. This is called ‘unpacking’.

  • Answer the unanswered questions

Whatever unanswered questions you have regarding trauma of the past is the reason you are carrying the pain with you.

You are lost and you have just had to move on because time doesn’t stop.

Now is your time to get closure.

As a youngster you may have felt unloved by your parents and blamed yourself for that. Now you’re older, you can recognise that your parents are just people- the same as you are. It was never about you doing anything wrong. The way people treat you is a reflection of themselves. Now you understand that, you will be able to forgive the past.

In a bad relationship you may have questioned why a person treated you like that- why they cheated, why they lied. You may come to the realisation that person has a deeply rooted problem in them, and you were just a person in their vision at that time. It wasn’t personal. While you can’t fix them, it’s time to move on.

Seeking answers in the form of books, psychological theories, something rational- that is what’s going to put your mind at rest.

Once you get the answer you can move on.

  • Write affirmations.

In all of this deep set healing it is so important to remind yourself who you are.

The good part of who you are.

You are not what happened to you, you are not how people see you, you decide who you are.

Write affirmations to submininally make you more conscious of how you talk to yourself, and how you feel about yourself.

“I am at peace”, “I am always on the right path”, “I can always make the decision to change my life”, “I am love and love surrounds me”, “my body is healthy, my mind is brilliant, my soul is tranquil”. 

Healing in this way may seem selfish and self indulgent as it means focussing a lot of energy on the self- but in actual fact, this is the least selfish method of healing.

You repair yourself and find your light again, and once you rediscover your light you can share it with the world.

Your eyes will be open to the opportunities you have everyday to be grateful, help someone, be happy for coexisting with other people.

I hope that it goes well for you.

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