I wrote an article for askastrology.com which should be out in the coming weeks. It’s called ‘what is a tower moment’, and it refers to a tarot card which I like the most, in a weird way.
When the article comes out I’ll link it here, you’ll see why it’s relevant.
Some people understand things spiritually, some people understand the world in less abstract terms.
I’m a really strong believer that everything happens for a reason, so when I don’t immediately understand why something is happening, it hurts. It really hurts.
I think a lot of people may resonate with that.
When you can understand a reason why somebody did something to you, or why something had to happen exactly as it happened, it’s easier to know what to do next.
When you can’t understand it, all there’s left to listen to is the ego. Just chattering away and conspiculating. ‘They did that because you’re not good enough’, ‘it was stupid of you to think that you could get what you want’, ‘you did this to yourself’, blah blah fucking blah.
It’s like, you kinda know that it’s all bullshit and that the world doesn’t actually revolve around you- but your insecurities have a way of latching on and convincing you that people’s every movement is conducted to hurt you.
I write about some deep stuff man, lmao.
Everybody has an ego, not many people know how to shut it off and gain control over your life in a healthy, free way.
We can have whatever life we choose to have- I’m living proof.
It’s just that a lot of people will think you’re crazy for going after it.
The ego is so exhausting. It thrives off of your pain and uncertainty.
The ego is the part of you that is out to protect you from harm, but in reality, it’s just stunting you from getting the life you want by keeping you small and getting you to go through the motions and do as you’re told.
The ego just reiterates something that happened, it doesn’t actually help you with regards to what to do next to get out of this situation.
I think the one thing I’ve learned in this last 2 or 3 years of healing and being committed to becoming my best version, is that the ego will explode, but for as long as you listen to it- you will remain stuck.
You need to learn to shut it off if you wanna free yourself and get what you want.
It’s all about balance.
The ego will swing back and forth between blaming everybody else and blaming you for your problems and mental state.
It keeps you up at night and stuff too. You can see why people go mad when they don’t have a faith or friends/family who keep you in check because if you were to live in ego all the time, of course you would want to numb your pain.
By any form of escapism. You’d just blindly run in any direction in hopes that it will save you.
Anyways, what am I talking about.
Life really does throw us a curveball from time to time and it’s only really difficult to make sense of when we are stuck in ego. The fact of the matter is that these curveballs are thrown at us in attempt to stop looking for outwardly vices and to just. Go. Within.
The emotional body is the one that people tend to listen to least, but it’s the one that has all the answers.
Through listening to the way we feel, and not the way that others say we should feel, we find fulfillment.
Usually, it takes one curveball in life to set the ego on a rampage.
Maybe you were cheated on, or maybe you were fired from a job. Maybe it was something more than that.
While it sucks that happened to you; what sucks more is the way that you become trapped in ego for the foreseeable future until you reach enlightenment again.
I’ll give an example.
Guy gets cheated on and turns to toxic masculinity. The little boy in him wants nothing more than to love and be loved, wholeheartedly, but he has become so accustomed to doubting himself and mimicking the actions of those he looks up to because they seem to ‘never get hurt’ that he won’t get that fulfillment. He’s too afraid to take the leap of faith.
Girl wants nothing more to make a full time living as an artist but she also wants to travel. Girl’s ego tells her that she can’t do both, because she’s been told her whole life that she can’t have both, so girl settles for working a 9-5 job and goes on holiday once a year. She’s unhappy, and she doesn’t know if she could succeed or not because she never tried.
Now, what if the guy who was cheated on let himself be angry for the week that he needed to get it all out, and then focussed entirely on his goals. Being a good person, the type of person who would never want anybody else to feel that same pain.
He’d have built himself a whole range of emotional intelligence, he’d of found an amazing circle of like minded people who motivate him, he might of even found true love.
What if the girl changed her attention to ‘how’ rather than ‘don’t even try’? What if she read all the business books, found entrepreneurs, focussed her time on changing her mindset?
She’d be earning top dollar because her education made her a powerful badass who is able to get whatever she wants.
What I’m saying here, is that the ego wants to have it all figured out right here right now so that we can change the way we feel right here right now.
We can change the way we feel right here right now, but not by obsessing over something that we don’t yet understand.
What are the things in life that you have always wanted to do that you aren’t doing?
Usually, you will find that the reason your life has become a shambles is because you’re not making yourself happy.
The universe has a way of shocking you to put you on the right track.
As a last resort, most of the time.
When you feel stuck, it’s because you’ve got to stir the pot.
Embrace the detour.